there's this one song -- "world of white", from bit depth's album "herdbound" -- that's been stuck in my head for a while now.
...well, okay, not the entire song, just the 2nd verse:
kick up my hooves,
charge at the monster in the dark
with desperate hope,
it’s unaware my teeth aren’t sharp
let me be hurt
let me be terrified and bruised
for i just know that you’re too much for me to lose
within the context of the song, this verse is -- of course -- an expression of love and devotion, of the subject's willingness to put their own life at risk to protect someone they cherish. as of recently, though, in a weird way, it's become a sort of private little battle cry for me.
I've struggled a lot with anxiety; over the years it has caused me to miss out on a lot of life. I've gotten better at getting past it, but it's still a very real obstacle, a little battle I have to fight every time I journey out of my comfort zone; something I'd been doing quite a bit in the recent times.
during a recent outing, I'd sometimes quietly sing that little verse to myself whenever I felt especially out of place, to comfort myself a bit. it's a really pretty, soothing verse, and it's a little reminder that -- unless I want to lose out on more of my life -- I sometimes just have to charge at my fears, regardless of how small and helpless and terrified it makes me feel.
let me be hurt, let me be terrified and bruised, for I just know this is too much for me to lose.
and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm and you are warm
check out the full song on bandcamp
...or on youtube
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( thanks for reading!! :3 )
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